Sunday Night Live

It's been a rough weekend but what's a better recovery on Sunday than sitting on your couch getting some light laughs. Here are three classic skits that I've been watching tonight and laughing my ass off.

Land Shark

Chevy Chase plays Land Shark in this skit dubbed "Jaws II". The shark has now developed the ability to walk on land and convinces young ladies to let him into their house. This will probably be my Halloween costume.

Land Shark | Movies & TV | SPIKE.com

Dissing Your Dog

Will Ferrel plays Dale Sturtevant in an infomercial parody selling a guide to training your dog. The last part of this one actually had me on the floor.



Celebrity Jeopardy

Tobey McGuire portrays Keanu Reeves in this skit where he proclaims "May I venture a guess. Jaleel White? Isn't that the young fellow who played Urple?"




On another note, I went to see Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds on Saturday. Please go out and see it. It is the best movie that has come out in the past five years. Hands down, I promise. This guy Christoph Waltz reminds me a lot of a young John Malkovich.

Rain Delay

Phillies got through a ridiculous thunder storm tonight with the great success of Jamie Moyer. I on the other hand have had a rain delay of my own while posting on this jawn. The rain somehow was made of tequilla and natty light... go figure.

Here's a tidbit until I write something legitimate. The thing about Family Guy is that I hate the idea so much (see Family Guy episode of South Park). But the little pop culture references always make me smile even if I try not to. Listen to Peter breaking out a humming version of my favorite movie theme song of all time in this clip.

Shirt of The Day

This shirt combines the ridiculously offensive Cleveland Indian with the city's only hope. LEBRON JONES...



Pennant Race - - Turntablelab.com

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Temple of the Blog

The late 80's and early 90's signaled the epic rise of a new genre of music: Grunge. This angst driven music was a direct response to the happy whiny music that came out of the 80's, especially hair metal. Kurt Cobain is the icon of this generation. The Nirvana's 1991 album, Nevermind, inspired a nation of wasted youth with Cobain alongside bassist Krist Novoselic and current Foo Fighter frontman Dave Grohl on drums. Other influential albums include the Stone Temple Pilots "Core", the Smashing Pumpkins "Siamese Dream, Soundgarden's "Superunknown", and Pearl Jam's "Ten".

The lead singers of all these bands each had unique voices all trying to pronounce the same idea. Billy Corgan's throaty whine contrasts with Cobain's melodic yelling, Chris Cornell's Plant-esque tenor, and Eddie Vedder's golden baritone. The world is lucky to hear the only collaboration between any two of these singers in the song "Hunger Strikes" by Temple of the Dog.

Temple Of The Dog - Hunger Strike
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The story behind this song is sad but simply fascinating. In fact, without this song the band Pearl Jam would never come to be.

One of the main bands leading the grunge charge in the late 80's was Seattle based (yeah they're all seattle based but whatever) Mother Love Bone. Mother Love Bone had a line up consisting of Andrew Wood (vocals), Jeff Ament (bass), Stone Gossard (rhythm), Bruce Fairweather (lead), and Greg Gilmore (drums). Wood was very well respected and fortunately best friends and the college roomate of Soundgarden frontman Chris Cornell.

Tragically Wood overdosed on heroin in early 1990. Cornell, as well as all of Mother Love Bone, was absolutely heartbroken. Cornell immediately sat down to write a handful of songs. While he was writing he contacted Gossard and Ament to help him create a tribute album to their dear friend. The three of them, along with Matt Cameron and Mike McCready soon formed the one time only band Temple of the Dog and begun to prepare their self-titled album. While recording "Hunger Strike", Cornell realised that something was missing and flew in San Diego native Eddie Vedder to help him with the song. The duo created a distinctive track formatted in the style of a round.

Without this happening the band Pearl Jam would have never been created. Shortly after the album, Vedder started recording with the members of Temple sans Chris Cornell (still obligated to Soundgarden). They took on the name Mookie Blaylock, the namesake of my favorite player in NBA Jam. Several months later the name was changed to Pearl Jam (sounding quite vulgar but apparently being named after Vedder's aunt Pearls' fabulous jam). Their best selling album Ten was released in 1992.

Mookie Blaylock is a hilarious name.

Outlandish Athlete Hall of Fame (Part I)

My boy Jimmie Frantz changed his picture on the book to this rookie card of Cade McNown. For those of you who don't know who Cade is, he was the 12th overall pick in the supposedly Quarterback rich 1999 NFL draft. Cade was the fifth quarterback drafted after Tim Couch (1), DONOVAN MCNABB (2), Akili Smith (3), and Daunte Culpepper (11). Daunte's career blossomed in Minnesota with Randy Moss but has been a wash ever since. Couch, Smith, and McNown went on to each have about a two year career. DONOVAN MCNABB IS THE MAN. (had to get that out)

Smith, Couch, and McNown lost out mostly to horrific coaching which crushed their careers. They were immediately put into the limelight for teams that rested their hopes on them and ultimately failed. But Cade found another claim to fame. Absolute athlete riciduclousness.

Athletes since the beginning of professional sports have been known to fuck up. And fuck up big time. I'm not even going to mention Michael Vick right now. Donte Stallworth served a 30 day sentence for not only a DUI but KILLING SOMEONE while doing it. Athletes like that literally got away with murder which is no laughing matter. But here are some who are.

CADE MCNOWN (straight jacked from wikipedia):

"McNown was charged in September 1999 with the illegal possession of a handicapped parking pass while playing football at UCLA in 1996, to which he pled no contest. Other players charged included Skip Hicks, Larry Atkins, and Brendon Ayanbadejo

Other controversies stemmed from McNown's relationship with a number of Playboy Playmates. The first was Miss January 1998 and 1999 Playmate of the Year Heather Kozar, who was dating Cleveland Browns quarterback Tim Couch when McNown began pursuing her; McNown bought her a Porsche and the two dated for a while before Kozar returned to Couch.

Not long afterward, McNown was "banned" from The Playboy Mansion after taking Brande Roderick, Miss April 2000 and Playmate of the Year for 2001, on a getaway to Mexico. Roderick was dating Playboy founder Hugh Hefner at the time."


The parking pass thing is just funny. Any college prankster would attempt something like that. But he fucked Tim Couch's wife and bought her a Porsche! What a great way to say you might have been drafted number 1 but I'm really number one biatch!

The next guy I'm going to shout out is my favorite fuck up of all time. Former Seattle Supersonics star and Cleveland Cavaliers disappointment Shaaaaaaaaaawn Kemp. Kemp, alongside Gary Payton, was the heart and soul of the mid 90's Sonics who along with the Jazz just could never beat daaa Bulls. After the 96-97 season Kemp threatened a contract holdout and was traded in a three way blockbuster to the Cavs. He immediately started getting chunky despite a new found cocaine habit, and stopped giving it anywhere close to his all.

What's funny about this is that Kemp by the time of the trade had 7 illegitimate kids with 6 different women giving a new meaning to a certain Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan movie. He tried to get back in shape throughout the 2000's scheduling workouts with several NBA teams and European teams but failed to show up to 90% of them. Maybe this is why...

"On April 4, 2005 Shawn Kemp was arrested in Shoreline, Washington for an investigation of drug possession. Kemp along with another man were found with cocaine, about 60 grams of marijuana and a semiautomatic pistol, according to the King County Sheriff's Office. On April 29 Kemp was formally charged with drug possession and pleaded guilty. Kemp was again arrested for misdemeanor marijuana possession in Houston, Texas on July 21, 2006.^"

I'll point out a couple more of these guys when I follow up with round two in a couple weeks. If anyone knows where I can get a 90's Sonics Kemp jersey keep me posted because I'd be very interested.

CowliSnarf

If anyone has seen the classic 80's cartoon "ThunderCats" they know this guy on the right, Snarf. Along with Lion-o, Cheetara, and the gang Snarf battled baddies throughout my early Cartoon Network career. Nowadays, my television watching centers more on the majority of men's staple network, ESPN. Tim Cowlishaw (left) is one of the many panelists on the show "Around the Horn". Though he may not be as wildly funny as Woody Paige, I personally think that he routinely has the best opinions on the entire show. Tony Reali, the show's host, quipped that Cowlishaw had a striking resemblance to my furry friend of television past about a week ago. I literally died laughing. While I assume that most do not find this anywhere near as funny as me I'd like to share this with my relatively small audience so that some person can find the same glimmer of joy.

My Handy Dandy Notebook!

So from here on out this jawn is my new handy dandy notebook. I use that term because Blues Clues is definitely something tight people like. Any show meant for little kids that you're still watching when your fifteen is definitely the shit.
(Getting a little tangential for a second but it'd be much funnier if we called plural things the shits. ex. "Yo man! Where'd you get those new SB's. Those jawns are the shits!"). Barney is not one of these shows. Neither is Teletubbies. But watching Steve get blazed and follow that little blue dog around can entertain me for a full episode. Plus its a mystery full of puzzles. I'm sorry if you disagree but this is coming from someone who gave National Treasure 3 four stars out of five.

The best part about Blues Clues is the social commentary.

No. I'm not talking about the show. I'm talking about how when you see some dorky ass man in a green striped sweater you immediately have the ability to call him Steve from Blues Clues in your repetoire. This is a much easier and suaver party trick than pulling out a deck of cards. Believe you me.

Look at this douchebag.

Sike, nah that's actually my friend Andrew who's horrific sweater inspired me several years ago. Props to him for having style as bad as his game.



Anyways, my name is Nick Renner and I hail from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I'm currently a Chemical Engineering nerd at Tufts University and some people think I'm a complete clown while I really am an evil genius like Dexter in the lab. This blog is going to cover a wide arrangement of things that I like since I am tighter than a Heebs pockets. I'm mainly into pop culture such as all formats of music, television, and cinematography. I'll do a couple reviews, but I'm mainly known for my short quips or rennerisms as some people call them. Hoping this pops off but I'm gonna jump around more than a white kid on adderall at a House of Pain concert.

One last thing I'm going to do is try to end off all my posts with some sort of media that I'm liking right now. This song "Big Easy" by Raphael Saadiq has been in my head for the last two days. It's a beautiful peice that sounds as if it was 60's motown even though it was only released last year. Saadiq's voice really stands out there with the greats as you will notice almost immediately. The song reflects on the aftermath of Katrina down in the N.O. The man that Saadiq portrays has lost a loved one in the floods though it is only specified as his baby (I'm not sure if that is to mean his lover or his actual daughter/son).

That's all folks so here it goes.

Raphael Saadiq - Big Easy